Feel alone? Isolated? Uncertain about the word gay? Newcomers often feel alone, like an outsider, or not certain if the Gay Fathers is the right place for them. Maybe this is your first contact with the 'gay community'. We've all been there. No one needs to remain alone.
That first meeting is a big step. The future may seem uncertain, stressful, scary, even spinning out of control. Yet, that first step may also hold the hope of a revitalized future, of personal growth, of hoped-for love, and of a new-found self-confidence. It may also mean family adjustments.
We won't advise. We will share our experiences, listen to yours, and support you in the path that suits you and your situation. We demand only a mutual respect for the differences and similarities of every man's situation and experience, his personal boundaries and privacy
At every stage of life something needs attending to. It may be an unfinished project, or bodily aches and pains that are being ignored, or a promised but unfulfilled commitment, or a sinking relationship, or an unanswered demand for information from the wife's lawyer, or unreasonable working demands, or - the list is endless - but we often get stuck. Even when wanted, change is stressful. Change may put us in places or social situations that are unfamiliar. Sometime we grind to a halt feeling fatigue, overworked emotions, stymied by past or hasty decisions, reluctant to make decisions because of past emotional highs and disappointments.
Doing nothing is an option. Sometimes (rarely) the problem goes away, but more likely, doing nothing means we've let someone else to decide. We like ourselves better usually, when we feel in control of our lives and are actively engaged it evolution. So, what holds us back? Fear that we may make a 'wrong' choice? What the neighbours or the kids may think? Overwhelmed by the size or number of problems? The cost?
How do you decide where to start? Do you know what you want? Are there deadlines and consequences for missing them? Identify what you can control and what is beyone your control. List of everything that must be done to achieve the goal and set milestones to get there. Asking for tips or suggestions is smart, not a weakness. What is your next step?
Discussion Facilitator: John J *Second Facilitator: Danny M
*When two or more facilitators are usually present, the Second Facilitator will be happy to talk privately if you prefer.*
The 519 Church St Community Centre, Room 304
Directions to 519 ►[Opens new window]◄
Gay Fathers of Toronto is operated by and for gay dads. All fathers, step-fathers, their same-sex partners, and all gay/bi men in a fathering role are welcome at a GFT meeting. It is an independent, peer support group that is run and governed by gay fathers. It has no political, corporate, or religious affiliation and receives no outside financial assistance. We ask each person to contribute $5 per meeting to cover website and other incidental expenses.
At your first meeting, though, you are our guest. If $5 is a financial burden or is the reason for staying away, please contact a Facilitator in person or email a private message to the lead Facilitator (email@example.com). We are here to support, not to inhibit or embarrass.
Meeting leaders are trained to facilitate discussions at support meetings; they are not professional life coaches, marriage counsellors, or psychologists.We talk about our own experience. We do not advise or challenge.
Predatory or intimidating behaviour will not be tolerated. Gay Fathers of Toronto has a Code of Mutual Respect. Ask a Facilitator to browse a copy of it if you want more information about it. Talk to a Facilitator or email us confidentially (firstname.lastname@example.org) about anything that offends or concerns you.